Getting to ‘happily single’ in my thirties wasn’t easy. For most of my life, I saw being single as something to escape.
The stigma, shame, and endless misconceptions about singlehood create a heavy, negative narrative—one that convinces us that being single is something to survive rather than a state we could genuinely enjoy. And for a long time, I bought into that, barely enduring my single seasons or doing everything to avoid riding solo.
But reclaiming singlehood and fully embracing this solo path has turned out to be the most powerful, fulfilling experience of my life. It’s been quality dating like I never expected—dating myself. And I’ve loved exploring what it means to feel perfectly, absolutely okay (well, most days).
My book, The Single Life Reimagined: From Surviving to Thriving, is coming soon. Until then, I’m sharing all the unfiltered, unabridged real talk here—hundreds of blogs on the highs, lows, and in-betweens of the single AF life.
Poetry for the Soul: Online Dating, An Untamed Beast
Online dating is an untamed beast— wild, unpredictable, emotionally unavailable. The possibility of a real connection feels more distant than ever. People treat people like objects, disposable, rejectable, "not real" enough to deserve respect. Mistreatment is rife, an ecosystem that thrives on disregard, tearing at your mental health, chipping away at …
When Does a Relationship Stop Being a Slow Burn and Start Being a Smokescreen?
Ah, the good old slow burner. Time and again I've sat eagerly awaiting a ping on my phone with that text, the one I’d hoped for, reassured that the person I'm dating is interested. It's a tiny glimmer of hope, that a thing might lead somewhere. They'll get there, eventually I …
The Unexpected Beauty of Being Alone in Public
I've come to learn that being alone is powerfully compelling, once you’ve reframed alone time as not something that has happened to you, but as a time to make things happen for you. And there is an unexpected beauty in being alone, especially in public. I used to see alone time …
Stop Waiting on Others to Explore the World: My Challenge to You—If Not Now, When?
I've spent so much time waiting on others, not signing up to experiences or exploring the world. Waiting on friends and family to have time, waiting on the next boyfriend to appear and be ready for an adventure or do a thing. It never occurred to me that I could, or …
Do We Have a Responsibility to Worry About Someone Else’s Singleness?
Do We Have a Responsibility to Worry About Someone Else's Singleness? I think not, and here's why. In my day-to-day job, I attend a lot of conferences. There's networking, nice chit chats with work colleagues across the industry, and a lot of intro conversations. Which all go something like this: “Hi, …
Happiness Doesn’t Start with Someone Else—It Begins When You Truly Meet Yourself.
Happiness Doesn't Start with Someone Else—It Begins When You Truly Meet Yourself. Or does it? It's certainly not the story I've been told. Meet someone, settle down, get married, have kids. Happiness and joy is found through others. When I reached my mid-thirties as a singleton, the pressure of these societal goals …
From Surviving to Thriving: Embracing the Single Life
I wasn’t aware that I had such a deep rooted disagreeableness with being single until about four years ago. Aged thirty six, fresh out of yet another short lasting relationship and back into my seemingly inescapable interconnection with being single, the overwhelming disappointment of being single again hit me hard. Wasn’t …
There Is Nothing Wrong With You Being Single
No-one seemed to mind as much when I was single at sixteen, eighteen or twenty one. However, single at thirty five, something changes. Single stigma seems to heighten with age. Because there is something about being single, especially once you reach your thirties and beyond, that suggests that you are now …
The Things You Are Doing Whilst Single Do Not Deserve Any Less Celebration
All in all, it’s fair to say that society can be fixated on conventional accomplishments and mainstream milestones, ones often intertwined with some aspect of partnership. Milestones like weddings, moving in with a partner, getting engaged, starting a family or beginning a new relationship. Whilst all of this is lovely, it …
When The Person in Your Situationship Wakes Up Ready For a Label. But Not With You
I’ve been in my fair share of situationships over the past seven years, because apparently they are on trend. Lucky me! And the most painful thing about those situationships, has been them waking up ready for a label, but not with me. Was I merely the warm up before the main …
Why Am I Still Single? The Real Reason …
Why am I still single?' I’ve lost count of the times I’ve asked myself this question. Often accompanied with the following, 'Am I not a nice person, not deserving of love? Have I not endured and suffered enough frogs? Am I too bossy? Too confident? Should I be less opinionated? Is …
You are so much more than who you are dating, so change the conversation
It wasn’t until I went single no mingle, that I realized how much dating had become an important part of my conversations with people. And by making who I was dating a highly discussed topic, I had inadvertently sent the message to myself that nothing else was more conversation worthy than …
How Do You Truly Embrace Being Single?
I used to see single as a situation to survive. It’s taken me years to get to a point of being able to say, ‘I love being single,’ and really mean it. It’s not been easy to trek for sure. However, it has been a lifechanging one. Which all started the …
Picture This: Days of Being Single and Rocking a Different Glow
You wake early to sunlight seeping through the window,birds chirping softly outside.No rush, just peace in this quiet moment,as you slowly unfurl yourself from the duvet,taking your time. Scrambled eggs and coffee sound perfect,so you make both, just the way you like.It’s a blue-sky morning, and you take your breakfast outside,soaking …
The Single Woman DIYer
When I moved into my first solely owned house post-divorce at 32, I was buzzing. My own place to do whatever the hell I liked with, how bloody exciting! And then I quickly realized that I didn’t have a frigging clue how to do any of the things I wanted to …
Online dating: Do We Need to Change The Game?
I mean categorically, yes. That wasn't a trick question. For anyone who’s spent any length of time in the world of online dating I know you’ll agree, it’s utter shit. I thought upgrading to digital was supposed to make life easier? But when it comes to online dating, it’s added a …
Are you Married? Dating? Oh, just Single then.
Rewind back to 2016, when I was 31, going through a divorce, and newly single. I didn’t plan to be single in my 30s of course, but there it was. Singledom. Suddenly feeling so much more irreversible than it had in my teens or 20s. Would I be single forever? Who …
Intentionally Dating Myself: Learning to Self-Date
Being honest, I only started considering the idea of dating myself after a long string of dating failures and bad relationships. I’d become accustomed to these repeated cycles and it sucked, big time. But generally, I’ve been much better at seeking out highs from other people, than I have been at …
The Problem with Disney’s Prince Charming
As a kid, my sisters and I spent hours watching Disney films over and over. I still love them so much that even at nearly 40 I’m spending a Sunday afternoon unashamedly watching Encanto … again. But the new era of Disney has a very different narrative to the ones I …
Death to Situationships, Because I’m Fully Over The Situation
Situationships. The whole, 'We’ve been sleeping together for a while, may have romantic feelings towards one another, but definitely aren’t, together’. A situationship is a relationship that isn’t a relationship at all. They’ve become a dating trend for me over the past seven years and I’ve found it a pretty destructive …
Is Online Dating Fundamentally Shallow? Here’s What You Should Know Before You Swipe
Searching for a real meaningful connection online has felt an impossible task when met with this constant affirmation that online dating is fundamentally shallow. Am I sounding a little negative? I've got a lot of reasons for that. Of course I'll be happy to be proven wrong one day but until …
Navigating the Dating Marketplace in My 30s: I Want Quality Not Quantity
I thought that online dating in my 30s would be a colossal leap forward compared to my early 20s. So I went in expecting a tad more refined and sophisticated versus, 'attempt to hold a drunken conversation with a stranger over deafening music in a sweaty, crowded bar' scenarios. However, I …
20 Reasons Why Being Single in Your 30s is Awesome!
When I entered my early thirties newly divorced and freshly single, being on my own seemed to carry this automatic notion that I was failing at life. I felt I should be miserable with my single situation because there seemed this instant pity the moment I told anyone that I was …
To Have Children Or Be Childfree? The Decision To Everyone Else Seems Inevitable
Are you deciding whether to have children or opt for a childfree lifestyle? Society often presumes that eventually you'll make the choice to have children, that you will get there in the end. As if there really wasn't a need to consider or a choice to be had at all. People …
“Single is no longer a lack of options – but a choice. A choice to refuse to let your life be defined by your relationship status but to live every day Happily and let your Ever After work itself out.”
