Amy Roullier is a British writer and author of Silent Reflections of a Fragile Heart. Through her blog, she challenges the negative stereotypes surrounding being single, while candidly sharing her experiences with mental health, personal losses, and the complex, often misunderstood realities of adulthood.
I’ve come to learn that being alone is powerfully compelling, once you’ve reframed alone time as not something that has happened to you, but as a time to make things happen for you. And there is an unexpected beauty in being alone, especially in public. I used to see alone time as an an involuntary circumstance forced upon me. A sign that I wasn’t wanted. Uncomfortable and lonely. That’s what …
I’ve spent so much time waiting on others, not signing up to experiences or exploring the world. Waiting on friends and family to have time, waiting on the next boyfriend to appear and be ready for an adventure or do a thing. It never occurred to me that I could, or in fact sometimes should, go for it anyway. As a single person in her thirties, I realised that if …
Happiness Doesn’t Start with Someone Else—It Begins When You Truly Meet Yourself. Or does it? It’s certainly not the story I’ve been told. Meet someone, settle down, get married, have kids. Happiness and joy is found through others. When I reached my mid-thirties as a singleton, the pressure of these societal goals came to a head. How could I ever be happily single, when happiness is only truly possible when not? …
I wasn’t aware that I had such a deep rooted disagreeableness with being single until about four years ago. Aged thirty six, fresh out of yet another short lasting relationship and back into my seemingly inescapable interconnection with being single, the overwhelming disappointment of being single again hit me hard. Wasn’t I supposed to be with someone by now? Who’d have thought nearly six years after my divorce that I’d still …
All in all, it’s fair to say that society can be fixated on conventional accomplishments and mainstream milestones, ones often intertwined with some aspect of partnership. Milestones like weddings, moving in with a partner, getting engaged, starting a family or beginning a new relationship. Whilst all of this is lovely, it does mean that other accomplishments, ones achieved whilst single, ones no less deserving of some celebration, frequently fall under …
I used to see single as a situation to survive. It’s taken me years to get to a point of being able to say, ‘I love being single,’ and really mean it.
It’s not been easy to trek for sure. However, it has been a lifechanging one. Which all started the moment I began to look at single as something other than a status I needed to do everything in my power, to change. I embraced being single, and in doing so worked my towards thrive rather than survive.
Being honest, I only started considering the idea of dating myself after a long string of dating failures and bad relationships. I’d become accustomed to these repeated cycles and it sucked, big time. But generally, I’ve been much better at seeking out highs from other people, than I have been at making myself happy. However, that was something I needed to change. Because like any relationship, I began to realize …
For the last ten months I’ve been working on some serious (-ly lacking) boundaries, prioritizing self-care and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. Part of that journey has involved getting really comfortable spending some alone with myself. So far I’ve tackled solo cinema outings, unaccompanied gigs, coffee and dinners by myself, solitary UK weekends away, and a whole heap of unaccompanied adventures and events. But I hadn’t yet tackled …
Dating myself has been one of the most important things I’ve ever done. It’s been quality single time discovering how to be comfortable and happy in my own presence. And doing it, really did help me discover the love that was missing for myself. These quotes about being single embody the way I’m feeling right now. Prepare to be empowered … 1) To love oneself is the beginning of a …
I’ve been single for a while now and I have to say, it’s working out. And that’s such a big thing for me to say confidently. Because for a really long time, I’ve tried to avoid singledom at all costs. I have dated many, many people over the past six years, but the only way I’ve come to be truly happily single, is to take a step back from dating …
