Online dating is an untamed beast— wild, unpredictable, emotionally unavailable. The possibility of a real connection feels more distant than ever. People treat people like objects, disposable, rejectable, “not real” enough to deserve respect. Mistreatment is rife, an ecosystem that thrives on disregard, tearing at your mental health, chipping away at your self-worth. It promises no guarantee of love, And only guarantees a heap of problems you never wanted, and …
Why Is It So Hard To Move In With Someone After Being Single For So Long?
For six years I’ve lived alone. Now, I’m moving in with someone. And I’m finding it hard to let go of the life I’ve lived for so long as it teeters on the edge of becoming ours instead of just mine. I find myself reminiscing about all the things I’ve loved about living solo. The simple pleasures; being able to spread myself across the whole bed, dinner whenever/and whatever I …
When Does a Relationship Stop Being a Slow Burn and Start Being a Smokescreen?
Ah, the good old slow burner. Time and again I’ve sat eagerly awaiting a ping on my phone with that text, the one I’d hoped for, reassured that the person I’m dating is interested. It’s a tiny glimmer of hope, that a thing might lead somewhere. They’ll get there, eventually I reasoned with myself; if I just gave them more time, was patient and stayed the course, sooner or later, …
My Definition Of Love Used To Be This:
My definition of love used to be this: Love meant giving everything. Losing yourself completely and willingly. Love was sacrifice. If you die, we die together. Love was a fairy-tale where nothing else mattered as long as we kept the flame alive. Love meant compromise of self— letting go of all other connections, pouring everything into just one. Love was never calm, never stable. It was lightning, fire, and chaos. Unpredictable, volatile, burning so brightly …
I Forgive You. But I Do Not Want You Back
You might be reaching out for forgiveness.You might be testing the waters,wondering if I could forgive enoughto let you back in.But I am empowered by the act of no action,the choice to let you pass bywithout any need to understandwhat you want this time. No part of me feels compelledto explore why you’ve returned.There are no regret here, only gratitudethat something ended which was never right.I’m thankful for the lesson …
When The Person in Your Situationship Wakes Up Ready For a Label. But Not With You
I’ve been in my fair share of situationships over the past seven years, because apparently they are on trend. Lucky me! And the most painful thing about those situationships, has been them waking up ready for a label, but not with me. Was I merely the warm up before the main event? The one who got them there, got them prepped for commitment, ready for something more but not the …
Promoting Self-Priority In A Relationship Is Fundamental To Wellbeing
Are you putting your partner and your relationship, ahead of you? I used to be that person who put my partner on a pedestal and prioritised my relationship above all other things. Their interests, their hobbies, their wants and needs consistently came before my own. Basically, I regularly backbenched myself. Why? Because that’s the way I thought I was supposed to do it. But I would come to a point …
Is being open to new friendships as you get older important to wellbeing?
Dr Miriam Kirmayer has spent the past decade researching the science of friendships. On her website she states, “Our friendships are one of the most important predictors of our health and happiness, but it turns out we don’t actually know or talk much about how we can make new friendships, keep and support existing friendships, or even end our friendships (when necessary) as adults.” She references that what really adds …
I’m prepping for the end of my relationship before it’s even really begun
If you are a regular reader of my blogs, you’ll know this. Historically, me and relationships are total train wrecks. I’ve spent nearly seven years in the land of single and dating, mostly never quite getting to full on relationship status. Occasionally they got a title, yet with no actual commitment behind it. So trust in relationships, has been difficult for me. But here’s the thing. I’ve met someone. We’re …
Online dating: Do We Need to Change The Game?
I mean categorically, yes. That wasn’t a trick question. For anyone who’s spent any length of time in the world of online dating I know you’ll agree, it’s utter shit. I thought upgrading to digital was supposed to make life easier? But when it comes to online dating, it’s added a whole load of extra. And that extra is exhausting as fuck, self-depleting, terrible for any kind of self-worth, and …